What Makes an Effective Low-Maintenance Parenting Plan in Colorado
Frequently, clients who are mostly amicable with one another come into mediation with many detailed questions regarding their division of property and financial agreements, but have spent less time thinking through the specifics of their post-divorce co-parenting arrangement. It is not uncommon for parents to assume that co-parenting will work itself out, and that they do not need to spend a lot of time and resources in mediation and/or with their attorneys detailing terms that they anticipate will be straightforward enough to figure out down the road. While this may be true for some, it can sometimes take a few years to get to a place where you are in a good enough space with your co-parent to reach agreements as things come up. For some divorcing couples, they are surprised by how things evolve and change, and it may even become more difficult to discuss parenting matters when both parents have re-partnered and may be blending families in new households.
Investing some time at the outset to reach clear agreements on key parenting issues, and having a ‘fall back’ in writing in case you cannot agree makes a lot of sense and serves to minimize opportunities for conflict. Some parents choose to use the standard Colorado judicial parenting plan template and to include additional and more detailed terms as needed. Others may use a more thorough ‘Memorandum of Understanding' with more discussion of major co-parenting categories. Finding a balance between sufficient detail and clarity, and not having a lot of complicated, difficult-to-follow scheduling nuances, can be a challenge. Creating a low-maintenance parenting plan will serve both parents and, most importantly, the children for years to come. Whether you are starting the process of creating a parenting plan or revisiting one that has been in place for a while, these are helpful tips for a low-maintenance parenting plan in Colorado.
1. Clear Parenting Time Schedule
Consistent schedule: Same days and times every week to create predictability for the child. Even if you and your co-parent deviate from this by agreement as many co-parents do, it is essential to have a written agreement that can serve as a ‘default’ if there are questions about interpretation and what was agreed to previously.
Holiday rotation: Pre-determined alternation of holidays and special occasions. Holidays and vacation time are a common source of disagreements for co-parents who are otherwise in agreement on most issues. In addition to clarifying the annual rotation of holidays, make sure to define the start and end of the occasion, for example, does Thanksgiving extend through the whole school break for school-age children or only the day of the holiday.
Flexibility for changes: Include rules for minor adjustments without court approval (e.g., switching days for activities or flipping weekends so one parent does not have three weekends in a row because of a holiday). Needing to bring in the court for every change will cause frustration, breed animosity, and will ultimately waste your time and money.
2. Decision-Making Authority
Shared decisions: Clearly define which decisions require joint agreement (education, medical, religion, extracurricular). In addition to the standard major decisions, it is often helpful to predetermine other decisions that you and your co-parent will make jointly such as access and use of social media, dating, driving privileges, and altering bodily appearance.
Day-to-day autonomy: Allow each parent to make routine daily decisions without consulting the other. Make sure that each parent knows which decisions are major and which can be made independently when they are the custodial parent (e.g., bedtimes and screen time limits).
Conflict resolution mechanism: Specify how disputes will be handled. If you and your co-parent anticipate having difficulty coming to agreements on specific joint decisions because there has been a history of conflict, it may make sense to stipulate in your parenting plan to submit any disputes to mediation/arbitration instead of court, which is less likely to provide a quick resolution.
3. Communication Guidelines
Parent-to-parent communication: Set preferred methods (text, email, co-parenting apps). For parents who have difficulty communicating, consider using a co-parenting platform such as Talking Parents or Our Family Wizard to streamline all communication.
Child-to-parent contact: Ensure the child/children has regular phone/video access during the other parent’s time, and that the phone/video contact does not disrupt the custodial parent’s time.
Neutral tone: Emphasize respectful communication to avoid conflict, as well as not discussing parenting issues in front of a child or using children to convey messages to the other parent. It can often take co-parents some time after a divorce or separation to maintain ‘clean’ communications and to resist the urge to become further entangled in arguments. Clear communication guidelines can aid in minimizing conflict and limiting the topics to be discussed to only those pertaining to the children.
4. Exchange/Transition Procedures
Consistent location: Same place for drop-offs and pick-ups to reduce stress. In some co-parenting situations, it can be helpful to identify a neutral location if transitions don’t occur through school.
Clear timing rules: Specify how to handle late arrivals and avoid last-minute changes.
5. Financial Considerations
Child support: Review and adhere to the Colorado Child Support Guidelines, and also clarify how the cost of extracurriculars, medical expenses, educational fees, and other shared expenses will be split. Consider using a more formal tracking mechanism, such as an expense app or at least a spreadsheet.
Simplify reimbursements: Use online tools and clear written agreements for expense sharing, including a timeline and process for reimbursement and reconciling costs.
6. Parenting Plan Review
Periodic review: Include a check-in timeline (e.g., annually) to adjust the plan as children grow. Almost invariably, parenting plans will change as children grow and are capable of going longer periods of time at each home. If one parent has majority time with the intent of transitioning to an equal schedule in the future, make sure to include a specific timeline and process for review.
Minimal court involvement: Use mediation or collaborative parenting for changes rather than filing motions. Involving the court in post-decree parenting matters should be a last resort and typically takes many months for resolution.
7. Extra Tips for Low-Maintenance
Avoid overly detailed rules that are hard to follow, such as complicated holiday rotations with little flexibility that are unrealistic long term.
Focus on reliability, flexibility, collaboration if appropriate, and mutual respect for timelines, schedules, and agreements.
Encourage co-parenting tools/apps to track schedules, messages, and expenses.
Create a “default plan” for holidays, when children are home sick, or family emergencies, so there’s no confusion even if you and your co-parent are usually flexible with one another.
A low-maintenance parenting plan in Colorado provides clarity, predictability, and minimizes conflict, so children have stability and parents have fewer disputes.
